The Bad Sequel Told Too Often: Think Like Man Too

       It is a tragic thing when a good film is tarnished by a crappy sequel. Though we always hope that this won’t happen, it often does. This is the case for ‘Think Like a Man Too.’ The first film ‘Think Like a Man,’ was a big box office success, pleasantly surprising viewers and critics around the country. The first film had a balanced ensemble cast with independent stories that was connected with a common thread and theme. The comedy and individual story lines were balanced, the humor was universal and the roles were independently strong. When so many things go right in the first film, it is always surprising to me that so much can go wrong in the next one.

Unfortunately, as far as reviews go, there is not much to be said about this second film that viewers have not experienced many times before with disappointing sequels. ‘Think Like A Man Too’ brought back all the original cast, but that is more or less where the good comments about the film stop. It seems that in this movie they were trying to make a hybrid of The ‘Hangover’ and ‘Bridesmaids,’ but far less effectively. This time around Kevin Hart is a much more famous comedian than he was at the time the first film came out. Because of this it feels like they rest the movie on his shoulders, making him more ridiculous and over the top than would be advisable to try and carry the movie on his own. From time to time there is a funny moment, but for the most part it is just too over the top cheesy and misses with most of the attempted humor.

World Update
     If you have been living in a box for the past couple weeks, you may not know that the world cup is going on. I know that most Americans aren’t too fond of soccer, it is slower than most sports we prefer, because a soccer game can end 0-0. However, even if you don’t like soccer, the world cup is worth checking out. It is the one time every four years that the best players in the world get together and go head to head and what results is no less than amazing.  

I Want to be Just Like Dad: Kids Who Followed Dad in the Entertainment Industry

Although I am absolutely nothing like my father, because he is brilliant, and anyone who has read my blog knows that I am…uh not (and that is the nice way to put it). I thought it would be appropriate to do something along the fathers day line so that I am not accused again of glossing over the holidays. Does this technically count as a holiday? Regardless, this post is dedicated to the sons and daughters who followed their dear old dads in the entertainment industry. Some of the kids are an improvement on their parents. Others…. not so much.

1. Will Smith / Jaden Smith — (Actors)

     For those of us who are not children, we remember Will Smith in the good ole days when his claim to fame was as a rapper, then transitioning to the Fresh Prince of Bel Air. With those origins, against all odds, he became a great actor and is ranked as one of the most bankable stars worldwide. As of this year (2014) his movies have grossed 6.6 billion dollars at the box office. Then he had to go and ruin it all by forcing his untalented son on us. I will admit that Jaden was really cute in “The Pursuit of Happiness,” granted he had like 3 lines. But Will insists on forcing us to look at him. All the movies Jaden has been in, Will was the producer and hired Jaden as both the “Karate Kid” and as his co-star in “After Earth.” (Jaden–Worse. Aka- Dear God no, please tell me he isn’t in another movie)

2. Archie Manning / Peyton Manning & Eli Manning — (Football Quarterbacks)

     Archie Manning may just be the most famous football parent of all time. Archie Manning (dad) was a good quarterback on a bad team in the NFL. He played 10 years and threw 24,000 yards for the then dreadful New Orleans Saints. Peyton and Eli Manning followed their dad’s lead and are currently quarterbacks in the NFL. Eli has won two Super Bowls, Peyton has won one. Peyton also boasts 5 MVP awards, and has recently set NFL passing and completion records.Though Archie was good, and I do not like Eli because his Giants two Super Bowl wins came against my Patriots I have to acknowledge the two sons talent. (Peyton and Eli — Pops was good, but he has less diamond studded jewelry. So I guess that makes his sons –Better)  

3. Billy Ray Cyrus / Miley Cyrus — (Singers)

     Country artist Billy Ray Cyrus’ claimed fame right out of the gate in his career. His debut album sold millions of copies, but Billy Ray is thought today to be a one-hit-wonder for his single “Achy Breaky Heart.” His epic rat tail (mullet) back then was more famous than his music ever was. His daughter Miley, though highly controversial these days, has eclipsed him ten times over. She started out as a pop country singer on the Disney Channel and has turned into a full fledged, and highly popular, pop star. (Miley — They’re both Meh. But she’s made way more money, so sure, she can be–Better)  

4. Joe Bryant / Kobe Bryant — (Basketball)

     Joe Bryant played nine seasons in the NBA before he finished his career overseas. For those who don’t know basketball, that means that he wasn’t good enough to play at the level of the NBA. His son Kobe, is one of the most prolific scorers in NBA history, and one of the most winning players of all time. He went straight from high school to the NBA and has spent his entire career with the Los Angeles Lakers. Though I have no love of Kobe as a person whatsoever, he is a pretty giant asshole, I cannot dismiss his obvious ability. (Kobe — Douche, but Better)

5. Donald Sutherland / Kiefer Sutherland — (Acting) 

     Donald Sutherland’s acting career has spanned five decades and includes work he has done on several continents. He has won several awards for his work and has earned a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. His oldest son Kiefer is best known for his work as Jack Bauer on the television show “24.” Kiefer has been in several movies, and lets just say that he is better when he has less words and more running around.  (Kiefer Sutherland — Stick to acting roles with very limited words. He’s definitely –Worse)    

I Feel Less Bad About My Job: Actors With Weird/Crap Jobs Before Becoming Famous

It is easy to be bitter against those who make so much more money than I could ever imagine or fathom. But I have found that when it comes to crappy jobs, the pain is real and universal. Shitty jobs are anything but glamorous, and certain A-listers can attest to this. I have scoured the web looking for some of the more odd stints out there, and these celebrities have certainly paid their dues.

Rod Stewart– Gravedigger

Before Stewart charmed audiences with his British accent, he worked as a gravedigger at Highgate cemetery in London during his teens.

Christopher Walken — Lion Tamer 

Yes, this is real! At the age of fifteen, Walken joined a traveling circus and was part of a lion taming act. Whenever asked about this job, Walken is always modest saying ” Sheba, the lion, was really old and more like a dog.” But apparently Walken has his fair share of scars on his back from this “really old lion” so apparently Sheba wasn’t that old.

Sylvester Stallone- Lion cage Cleaner

Sticking with the lion theme, Stallone cleaned up after them. While waiting for his acting career to take off, the Rambo actor cleaned up lion cages at the Central Park Zoo.

Jon Hamm– Set Dresser For Porn Films

Hamm, who stresses that the porn he designed sets for was strictly soft-core, said it was an easy way to earn a few hundred bucks a day. “Essentially, I had to move furniture around sweaty, naked people. It wasn’t a great job but the money was useful. I had to get by and I wanted to be an actor.”

Whoopi Goldberg — Mortuary Beautician & Phone Sex Operator 

The 56 year old comedian and actress took a job as a mortuary beautician after she became a licensed beautician. Her boss played a welcoming prank on her by pretending to be dead and sitting upright to wave at her. During a segment of “The View” she also mentioned briefly working as a phone sex operator. “When I was younger the money was great, See now, people would know my voice.”

Hugh Jackman — Party Clown

Jackman’s natural comedian tendencies would make him the perfect candidate for a party clown. At about $50 per show, he’s come a long way.”I just love making a fool out of myself. I made my living as a clown at kids’ parties for about three years. I was Coco the Clown and I had no magic tricks and I remember a six year old standing up at a party saying ‘mummy this clown is terrible, he doesn’t know any tricks’- and he was right.”

Brad Pitt — Chicken Suit Mascot & Limo Driver For Strippers

 Today, Pitt may be one of Hollywood’s leading men, but once upon a time, he was nothing more than a chicken on the side of the road. His first employer was El Pollo Loco and he had to dress like a chicken to hand out flyers and attract passers by to eat tacos. During that same year he chauffeured strippers in a limousine. “My job was to drive them to bachelor parties and things. I’d pick them up, take them to the gigg, collect the money and play the bad Prince tapes while catching the girls clothes.”

Johnny Depp — Telemarketer -Pen Salesman 

Don’t be so quick to hang up on those telemarketers, you never know who they might end up becoming. This is certainly the case for Johnny Depp. One of his first jobs was cold calling strangers, trying to sell them pens. He claims this job was useful in his acting career as he would use different accents and personas with each call.

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The Originator of Our Childhood Nightmares: Maleficent

When you have been really bored have you and your friends ever sat around and talked about, of any Disney character ever made, which one would you be? No…? Just me and my weird friends? This was a thing my friends and I would do, as adults mind, and if you are thinking “this chick seems like the epitome of cool” then you’d be right. I bring this up because as the friends we would assign the characters to each other, the ones we thought fit best. It could be any Disney character, whether princess, role player or some of the non-animated ones. Though this is a silly thing, we did try and make an accurate comparison to the person with a Disney character. And whom did my loving friends assign to me? Maleficent. My friends are gems aren’t they? So when this live action film came out, I had to go see it.
The critics aren’t loving this film but the audiences are and I can see why.
A few professional critics said that the movie was only “o.k.” because there wasn’t much to the film other than Angelina Jolie as Maleficent. …seriously? The movie is called Maleficent, it is HER story this time, not anyone else’s, so yeah, there isn’t going to be a ton of story other than Angelina Jolie as Maleficent.

 For my part, I am not a big Angelina fan, but in this movie I thought she was the perfect fit. Not only is she an eerily striking visual match, but I was very impressed by her acting in this film. I think it would have been very easy to mess up this type of character by being a touch too dramatic with it, but Jolie did not fall into that mistake. As I said, since the movie is 95% Maleficent, if Jolie had been the least bit weak in this role, the movie would have failed.

     Maleficent is one of the most remarkable spectacles of the CGI age, and one of the few recent 3-D movies where it’s probably worth paying extra for those damn glasses. There is definitely a quality of too-much-ness about Maleficent. Like eating all your Halloween candy in one go. But at least it’s delicious candy. But by far the biggest and most effective special effect in Maleficent is the queenly and sarcastic Angelina Jolie in the title role, as a betrayed and vengeful fairy princess who will wow tween girls by the zillions. The regal posture, the internalized pain and the injured pride all spoken through the now necessary villainous British accent – are all Jolie.

     I can see why a lot of journalist don’t love it, it is somewhat of a stylized mishmash resembling many of the numerous fantasy movies, television shows or plays that have come out in the last 15 years. But Disney’s target audience is not these middle aged men. But truth be told, this movie is just a ton of fun and a lot of the brothers, boyfriends and dads who claim they don’t want to come along will enjoy it a lot too.